cough up a lung /ain’t nothing nice.

[this is a very preliminary draft]

here I am, couple weeks after writing the first sentence…
attempting to write a couple more.

a lot of thought has gone into the piece,
I’m just not sure where to put it all yet.

& I really did have every intention of writing this,
before seeing that parent,
who came in (still in her pj’s /weave looking a mess),
to speak with her son’s first grade teacher,
or getting a position working in an elementary school. <— (on some whole other sht,
that’s how you line break.
homie)

[please realize that this is a hybrid text (partially written in Black English) and therefore it is grammatically consistent – although I’m sure you’ll find a few typos... i'm not like these backwoods rednecks around here who simply just do not know how to speak and or write. some people don’t get that. word to brotha Malcolm , my verb agreement is different, along with my sentence structure, AND not only do i omit certain words, some of the words I use cannot be found in Webster’s dictionary. last but not least, s/o 2 any fat.booty.midget btches from the Stuy #BrooklynStandUp]

the community in which I live, and work, is an very dismal place. the majority of folk round here have extremely low expectations, therefore set no goals, and rarely ever accomplish anything… in the words of a fellow educator, “St Albans city isn’t like it was when we were younger, it’s gone to total shit. The only reason that I still teach is for the benefits. These kids are awful, and the parents are even worse.” It’s easy to see where my comrade is coming from; this little New England town (that’s classified as a “city”) breeds a peculiar ignorance [only found in rural America] that plagues most of its inhabitants.

they might blame it on the alcohol, drugs, and or poverty, but I refuse to let such be their excuse; the majority of these crackers round here might as well be extra’s from the movie Deliverance, while these backward ass coons aren’t any better; nothing more than mere imitations of BET caricatures (thank God, there’s only like 13 of us who live here). It isn’t hard to tell that I respect very few people in this community. why would I? and for the most part, kids growing up here, have very little hope of ever making it out. I did, but then I came back, hopefully to save others. and before I’m swallowed up, you better believe I’ma make moves back to the 718, bc that’s where “my” people reside. when I say “my” i’m not making reference to a skin color /or race … i’m making reference to a mind state. and sure, my people in BK are going through the same struggles (if not more so) but see, they’ve always accepted me, & never looked at me as anything other, while the white folks up here still aren’t used to seeing my yellow ass walk to the streets. all that gawking, & at times praise, makes me feel a lot like a Gypsy Vanner or Friesian Horse.

tbc